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October 03, 2009 - 9:13 AM Becoming Man and Wife On Friday, September 18, 2009 I became a husband, and yesterday we celebrated our two week anniversary. The wedding was great, the best way to get married if you ask me. Small, intimate, scenic, unforgettable. Kristi and I were married on a boat in the Pacific ocean. Surrounded by water as far as the eye could see, the peaks of Vancouver just barely visible on the horizon, we said our vows to each other in front of our parents, our girls, and our friend Rick. Kristi's father performed the ceremony, and the girls sat, beaming, on the bench as we placed the rings signifying our commitment on each others' fingers. A perfect fit. From the deck below, my mom and dad, Kristi's mom and Rick sat and witnessed the union. And once it was official, we spent the rest of the evening boating together, telling stories and laughing. I may have even slipped in a joke or two along the way. It was everything we wanted and nothing we didn't. And now, after many requests and an un-Johnly delay in their posting, here are some pictures from our wedding.       Miles, one of rick's two dogs, posed with Kristi and the girls for this picture.             Sneaky groom                            Perspectives On Marriage Life after the wedding I am sitting in line at Mr. Lube, waiting for an oil change. I had the windshield replaced this morning, so I thought I'd get this done too while I'm at it. Waiting in line gives one time to think, and I just got off the phone with Barb (though rather abruptly as the battery in my phone died mid-conversation. Sorry about that Barb.) We were just talking about married life, what with my cumulative two weeks and her approaching twenty-two years, and some thoughts on the subject. Married life changes you. How much more so does being married with children. While getting married is significant, I think the biggest adjustment is not wearing the rings on the fingers but the process of moving in together, a transition which Kristi and I had a head start on. Yes, being married is (supposed to be) permanent, yes there is a commitment between you and your spouse that is based on trust and honesty, commitment and deliberate acts of the will, but truth be told, all those things were there before we sailed the wedding ship. What was a big adjustment, especially for me, was living together. And yes, we have a beautiful house, tastefully decorated and furnished (entirely the work of Kristi, let's not kid each other here...) So in that respect, very much a matter of moving up in the world. Coming from the basement suite of a construction site in a neighbourhood where I've heard shots fired and people have been murdered within eyesight of the house, into a two year old, two storey house in the quiet outskirts of a new community inhabited mainly by young families and friendly neighbours, where all you see are people pushing baby carriages or walking their dogs, I'd say I did alright. But living with three women is entirely new. For one, our appliances have been getting much more of a workout than any piece of life-enhanching machinery I've ever owned. Both the washing machine and dish washers run daily now, where mine might have seen a load or two on a weekend. We have nicer bathroom towels than I've ever owned. I cannot believe how much food we go through now either, though remarkably I've actually lost about ten pounds since June. Kristi takes excellent care of me, and I've never known such love and support outside my immediate family. I love her more than life itself, and I'd do anything for either of the girls. Time allocation certainly has changed though, and my priorities in life are becoming much more family-focussed as I now find myself in the roll of husband and father. Whatever the case, it is crystal clear: my life will never be the same.  BACK to Journal Index |